“God many times answers our prayers not by bringing down his will to ours, but by lifting us up to himself. We grow strong, so as we need no longer cry for relief. We can bear the heavy load without asking to have it lightened. We can keep the sorrow now and endure it. We can go on in quiet peace without the new blessing which we thought necessary. We have not been saved from the battle we shrank so from entering but we have sought and have gained the victory. Is not victoriousness in conflict better than being freed from the struggle? Is not peace in the midst of the storm and the strife better than to be lifted altogether over the strife?” -Dr. J. R. Miller

when we make too much haste of things
we don’t stop to notice people, or things, or ourselves

we walk without looking
forgetting that hurrying doesn’t always make up for time
it sometimes kills it

slow down
look around
and find out what you’ve been missing all around

the old woman by the roadside with a lost look
the kid who lost his ball
the squabbling lovers
your heartbeat

come back to the present, and the future will take care of itself

come back.

So if I ever see you on the street
I’ll pretend that I didn’t see
And turn my face
No use in small talk anyways

Because if I look into your eyes
Then I’ll have to say goodbye
And that’ll break my heart
So I won’t even start

I won’t even start

You let me in so swiftly, allowing yourself to be exposed. I hardly had time to process everything that you were throwing at my face and suddenly, you’re so adamant on pushing me far, far away. Was it that amusing to kill time by torturing me? It’s been years. You’re never making it easy for us. What are you playing at? If this is a game to you, I want out.

I might just need that trip to Thailand after all. Just to get away from you and the madness that comes along with you.

I am still a kid, forever in a rat race for the most minute issues. It’s high time I need to grow up and look forward into things that are far more important. I always talk about how my past have made me broken, but then again, if I had never experienced that, I wouldn’t be as sane as I am right now.

I have come to a conclusion that I’ll be falling a million times before I can come to terms with what’s mine and what’s not. For now, I’m certain that you’re not. So this heart of mine will be guarded tightly against you from now on.

Come what may, I believe that God has it all planned out for me. It’s just that, I lack patience. And I need lots and lots of it.

Help Save me.

Its not an exclamation of boredom or whining. It’s glee!

It’s been tremendously overwhelming since this semester started. With core module presentations deadlines around the corner and a CCA to handle, my schooling schedule has never been more packed.

I am getting used to this sort of ‘busy’. It’s nice for a change though I dread that im lagging behind my Korean drama serials

There isn’t anything to hate about life at the moment except for the two group projects shoved to my face. I absolutely cannot work well with any of my classmates. Vice versa. Tis’ a sad phase in life concerning my class but I’m not going to let 38 people bring me down.

It’s been 7-8 months since school started and it’s surely flying by faster than you can say ”wow-wee!”. I’m glad I’m still going full steam ahead and have many more things in mind to accomplish. It’s a year different from any other.

It’s down to two months till 2011. I am excited. I am ready for what’s in store in the upcoming year.

For now, I’ll have to prepare interview questions for someone who has so kindly allowed me to waste his time!

Till the next update

It didn’t feel the same as I watch them perform for the 1000++ girl fans again when they were in full gear and make-up.

I managed to snap one photo in secret (due to licensing) from quite a distance (well not so secret anymore after this) but unfortunately iPhone isn’t a DSLR so hence I’ll have to remember yesterday night from this sole photo.

It was fun, money was good, fans were nice. The entertainment biz is fascinating. It’s something I’d want to explore further!

All I want is to find an easier way to get out of my little head. To think I might not see those eyes makes it so hard not to cry. And as we say our long goodbye, I nearly do.

Or maybe this is just an excuse.

I realized what I have been doing. Shutting myself from needing somebody and feeling okay cause being alone isn’t that bad after all but once you opened up your heart, and all the void starts sucking reality in. Then it strikes you how lonely it has been all this while.

We’re actually on to something and I’m ready to take risks. Things just won’t do without you, matter of fact. If you walk out on me, I’m walking after you.

(No more than a par 72, I’m afraid )